Captain Chesley “Sully” Sullenberger will set a record for public appearances in 2009. In fact, he will grow to love the spotlight so much that he will resign from US Airways and become a professional hero.
The Obamas will decide against getting a family dog. Instead, they will adopt Katie Couric as the White House pet.
Israel and Palestine will stop all their stupid bickering and fighting and forge a lasting peace. Yeah, right.
Arizona is the sunniest state. North Dakota is the windiest. These states will be the designated energy states and will pump energy to the rest of us via solar cell and wind turbine.
August is a month in need of a national holiday. August 4th will be declared Barack Obama Day, in honor of his birthday. In an address to the nation, Obama will promise to make every day a national holiday.
The Red States will secede from the Union. Red and Blue States will engage in the second Civil War. The Blue States will win, and the religious right will be cast from this earth.
Marijuana will be legalized in California and, because of the additional revenue generated, its debt will be gone by the end of the year. Schwarzenegger will invite other governors to Sacramento to get high with him.
1 comment:
And the population of the U.S. will double. Simply because of the economic stagnation, everyone will have nothing to do but fuck!
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